Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Chinese Food and the Devil from the DMV


It's Friday and I don't feel like cooking and Sebastian is sick and wants his favorite food, Chinese take out. And since everyone knows there are zero calories on Fridays, of course I oblige.

I called our order in ahead of time and it seems like no matter what I order the lady always says "ok, ten minute" so I always give it 20 "minute" instead.

I arrive just in time. The Chinese lady is gathering my order on the counter just as I walk in. To my left is a lady waiting for her order. She obviously either did not call ahead or believed the Chinese lady with her erroneous "ok, 10 minute" promise. I realize that I know her from somewhere, but where? Ours is a small town and I know she has been on the other side of the counter from me somewhere... let me think, she is always a little bit too pompass and acts like my time is of no consequence... oh of course! She works at the DMV! (Dept of Motor Vehicles) How can I describe the general attitude of the average DMV employee? I guess they act like any other government worker; bored, irritated with others' ignorance of government procedures, slow to act, they answer "No" with no further explanation... the list goes on. For instance there is a disfigured gentleman who also works there who always acts like all of his customers are total morons. I can't help but think that people work there so that they can make others feel as bad as they have always felt about themselves. If you've ever been there you know there is an indescribable quality in these people that just says "you're an idiot and I am miserable because of it".

Last year when Jenny was our Nanny, she needed to get a license if she was to be of any use to me so we spent many hours at the DMV. Applying for a license, filling out endless paper work, practicing for the driving portion of the test. This lady standing next to me was always there to make us feel completely unimportant and ignored.

Is it wrong that I am getting a secret thrill from watching HER stand in line for once?! I ask the chinese lady "is this my order?" The DMV lady cuts me off, "no, I've been waiting for 15 minutes so I'm sure it's mine" The chinese lady asks me "what your phone number?" I tell her and she says "Oh this your order, I get one more thing for you" and she disappears into the back. I smile smugly at the DMV lady and say, "It's quicker if you call ahead". I am secretly gleeful.

I am momentarily distracted by Bash and the fish tank. When I look back there is a small brown bag on the counter next to my order. "is this mine? I ask. The DMV lady says, "no" and after a moment meekly says, "I think it's mine..." That's right I said "meekly". I am enjoying this ever so much!

The bag is hers. I pay for mine and as I am heading out the door, I say, "I know where I recognize you from... the BP gas station, right?" She stares at me incredulously, "Uh, no," she quickly corrects me, "I work at the DMV".

Yeah, I knew that.

This message has been brought to you by:


"The DMV. We'll employ anyone with a pulse."

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Wednesdays with Mom Mom

She creeps in the front door... many times I am back in bed after getting Bash off to school. I hear the front door creak open and a voice say, "Hello!" Then the pitter patter of two pairs of feet running to greet our visitor, "Mom Mom!!" Parker and Caroline shout.


We have been so lucky to have Mom Mom visit us many a Wednesday. She is not your typical grandma. Or maybe she is. She spoils them rotten and can't seem to say "No". But she also plays Wii with them even if they always beat her badly.

She plays train conductor and super heroes, tea party and monsters, dress up and hide and seek. In short, she'll do anything they ask her to.

She always brings a salad to share for lunch and knows not to share her brown soda!

She'll watch "The Bee Movie" over and over and over again without (much) complaint. Then there's almost always a special trip to Target and a small gift for each child, and of course, a slushy. If I let her, she'll spend all her hard earned cash on my already spoiled children!

Later, she'll watch Bash play soccer and cheer him loudly. The kids are always sad to see her go but not too sad. They know we'll always see her next Wednesday!

Monday, May 3, 2010

Thoughts for the day... On appropriate footwear.

Picked up Sebastian from school. He's wearing the outfit I put out for him (t shirt and shorts- it 80 degrees) except... he's wearing boots. Obviously, it was Todd's day to get him out the door. Did he not look at Bash's feet? Lol. I'd hate to see what he'd be wearing if I left that part up to Todd!

Just now Parker wanted to go outside to play soccer with Bash. I told him to take off his flip flops and get his tennis shoes on. I went to check on him five minutes later and not only is he not wearing tennis shoes but he has taken off his pants. How is this logical to this child? Sigh. Although, those of you who know Parker are aware of his fondness for going commando or just wearing underwear or being bottom-less altogether.

I am going to try to post at least once a week. It may not be super exciting but I'm hoping it will keep everyone updated better!